Resilience includes managing challenges like work stress, relationship issues, coping with emotions, finding our way through life’s difficulties and being able to come out the other side. If you face adversity in one of these and decide to take the challenge head on, whether easy or difficult, that is resilience. You can probably recall a time like this, whether it was in your youth at school or more recently in your work or relationships.
Resilient people tend to have certain characteristics or skills which, thankfully, we can learn these if we don’t already have them. These characteristics include positive future expectations, personal control, and belief in one’s abilities. Resilient people have healthy self-esteem, good coping skills and problem solving abilities. Further traits include optimistic thinking, internal motivation and initiative. Combined, these are characteristics of individuals who are confident, have a positive sense of self and may view themselves as capable in the face of life’s difficulties. They genuinely feel that they can do something about their situation or environment and can learn from hardships. Resilient individuals are more likely to act positively by learning more, taking opportunities, seeking mentors, getting involved in extracurricular activities and finding partners that are supportive. They are also likely to think of negative things as temporary.
As you begin to work on any one of the above skills, the others tend to follow. But whatever the shape of your resilience today, it’s a result of a long process that began in your formative years.
Note: this video is not a substitute for actual therapy. It aims to provide understanding and techniques to use in the absence of therapy.